In this episode of the Date Brazen podcast, Lily engages with Susan Hyatt, a master certified life coach, bestselling author, and TEDx speaker. They discuss Susan’s mission to empower women through her Bear process, which emphasizes self-care, body wisdom, and breaking free from diet culture. The conversation explores the importance of creating a thriving environment, embracing pleasure, setting boundaries, and taking bold actions in midlife. As they approach the New Year, Susan shares insights on goal-setting and the significance of living a pleasure-centered life, encouraging listeners to overcome obstacles and embrace their potential.

You’ll learn:

• Susan Hyatt is a master certified life coach and bestselling author.

• The Bear process focuses on self-care and body wisdom.

• Environmental detox is crucial for creating a thriving space.

• Mindset work helps break free from diet culture.

• Pleasure is essential for healing and well-being.

• Setting boundaries is key to listening to your body.

• Embracing bold actions can lead to personal growth in midlife.

• New Year energy can be harnessed for goal-setting.

• Creating a pleasure-centered life enhances overall happiness.

• Obstacles are not greater than one’s potential.

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Show transcript:

Lily @ Date Brazen (00:00.088)

Okay, great. All right, Susan Hyatt. So glad you’re here. Okay, let me do a little intro and then we’ll get into it. All right. Hello, gorgeous friends. Welcome to another episode of the date brazen podcast. So glad that you’re here because we have an epic guest. We have an epic guest among us. We always have epic guests. And today we have Susan Hyatt.

She is a master certified life coach, bestselling author and TEDx speaker. She is on a mission to ignite big yes energy in women everywhere from boosting your bank account to chup, bruh, Darlene is my editor. She’ll take it back if we need to Susan. Darlene will take it back. From boosting your bank account to supercharging your self-confidence, from elevating your energy levels to amplifying your joy, Susan is the go-to expert for women who want more.

With 17 years of coaching experience under her belt, Susan has guided thousands of women through their personal revolutions. She’s a crusader against diet culture and a vocal advocate for closing gaps in wages, confidence, and orgasms. Thank you, Marpleys. She is also the creator of Bear, a groundbreaking process that is also the title of one of her books that has inspired women all over the world to stop shrinking their bodies and start expanding their lives.

When she’s not hyping up her clients, leading epic retreats around the world, or making a scene in outfits that you will be so jealous of, you’ll hopefully go out and buy your own. Susan can be found weightlifting, marathon training, globetrotting, or cozying up in her high-geek corner, which I also want to touch down on as it is the winter time. She is not shy about advocating for equality at home, regularly reminding her husband about the importance of sharing the invisible workload so she can

continue to earn big and play big. Susan, hello. Hi, thank you for that lovely intro. my God. Well, I, you know, I got the privilege of being on your pod. Yes. And we talked about there how we met, but I just saw you at a party at Carl Lowenthal’s book launch event. And I knew I had brought a book, copy of my book to give to you because I thought I know that she’ll be here and I think there’ll be an opportunity. And so I just went up to you and said, you’re amazing.

Lily @ Date Brazen (02:15.7)

I love you. My clients love you. I have so many clients who’ve worked with you, who work with me as well. I feel like our work has a lot of synergy. And so I’m just honored to have you on the podcast. I know. I listen, I’m honored to be here and I loved meeting you. And when you walked over to me, I was like, that’s one of my people. Yes, you have big yes energy. Well, I put on my outfit that because truly I talk about the way you dress, not in a way to

downplay anything else brilliant that you bring to the table, but just like you are embodying your work, I think all the time. Thank you. Well, every facet. It’s part of the bear process, right? How you adorn yourself, how you layer fabric against your skin matters. It has an energy. you know, if, and everyone’s style is different. So it’s not, it’s not that

everyone needs to dress a certain way, it’s that you need to dress in a way that matches how you feel. Yeah, I think just that level of intentionality. Can you talk about the bear? I didn’t write down this question, but can you talk about the bear process and guide us through a few of the steps and like, what’s the intention behind it? I think I’m going to put your podcast editor to work this moment. Can I land this very sad into the

Somehow the door got closed all the way and he’s staring at me crying. No, you can’t. You can’t have that energy for 40 minutes. OK, I know. All right. Go lay down. OK, sorry. Can you ask your brilliant question? Absolutely. OK, so can you take us through a few like what is the intention of the bear process and what are the steps in the bear process?

Sure. So the intention behind the bear process, really was created as a result of, I started tracking homework assignments that I gave my clients that worked. because I’ve been talking about food and body most of my career, and what I started to notice was that it was really boring and ineffective to talk about

Lily @ Date Brazen (04:37.77)

what’d you eat today? And to instead start talking about self care in a way that was not a chore or another part-time job, but really get down to the depths of why are you eating the way that you are, moving the way that you are, dressing the way that you are, what are you tolerating? And so the process is designed in a way

The steps are in an order so that it can free up capacity along the way so that then you can start to focus on some of the things that are the hardest. Everyone wants to say, okay, well, what should I eat, Susan? What should I eat? What do you eat? And the truth of the matter is that’s like the least interesting thing. And we don’t start with food because I think that’s such a distraction.

We start with something called environmental detox, which is what’s your diet through all of your senses, not just your mouth. So what are you listening to? What are you looking at on a daily basis? Everything from social media to conversations you’re tolerating, the people that you have around you. And yes, like what are you eating for sure, but it’s more, how can we cur-

create an environment for you that helps you set you up for conditions for thriving. And so really evaluating your environment, your physical environment, not just like, does my office look pretty, but do I have what I need? Who’s around me? If I’m working in a cubicle, am I tolerating gossip right next to me? And going through

the steps of shoring up all of those energy leaks. So environmental detox is a big one. I mentioned wardrobe, you were talking about clothing, closet detox is another one. And it’s not what you think. It’s not, let me just organize and declutter or let me just make sure I have cute things or what’s on trend. It’s like, no, like your closet is telling a story. And if an independent reporter,

Lily @ Date Brazen (06:59.744)

A documentarian were to go, Lily, into your closet and look at your shoes, your clothes, your accessories. What story do you think if they didn’t know anything about you? What story do you think they would tell?

Can I answer? Yeah. I just recently looked at all of my clothes for the because every single year of my adult life, I’ve had the thought at the end of the year, I don’t have any clothes for the winter. don’t know. I’m behind. I need to spend a thousand dollars at least on a closet revet. Right. And that panic has led to some like great shopping trips in the past years. But I did this like reset and

I think right now my closet would say, just did this with this intention of just like, how can I be really aligned? And I just feel like I want to feel comfortable and chic. And like, and so those two things, I hope that, and I have aspirations, right? Like I’m, and again, this is a microcosm of a bigger thing. I have aspirations for a different.

few pieces that are very chic and very expensive. have that aspiration for an apartment that matches my energy more in the future. And I’m so proud of where I’m at now. And that is new for me. Like the like contentment and the vision. Yeah, it’s that’s question I get a lot as a coach is is you you can be grateful for

everything that you have right now while also understanding that you have goals to reach for something different. And it doesn’t diminish or disrespect the beautiful place that you live now and the beautiful things you’ve created for yourself now. just means like, yeah, I’m going places. Okay, gonna have this apartment and these investment aspirational pieces. there’s nothing wrong with that. But I love the feeling states that you picked out, right?

Lily @ Date Brazen (09:01.834)

a lot of people, me included, before I really embodied this work, their closets would tell the story of 10 different sizes, right? And stacks of things in different sizes. And like, can’t get rid of that because when you say aspirational piece, you are talking about chic and comfort. Most women talk about aspirational pieces as I’m gonna get back into

this size, this little black dress, I’m gonna zip this little black dress. And what that creates is a lot of fear and shame when you see like all of this stuff that maybe your college self-war or your 20 something self-war or your pre-children person war. so I’m just all about, let’s just get all that shit out.

Yes. Let’s make sure that what’s in your closet fits you right now. And when you put it against your skin, it feels amazing. So your feeling states are comfortable and chic. Somebody else’s might be, I feel, I want to feel, you know, empowered, whatever it is. I like comfortable and chic. would say I love that, that those feeling states for my everyday kind of work wear, but

Nevertheless, it’s like, there’s usually a mismatch. Like some people have all these corporate outfits and nothing that represents pleasure or fun or who they actually are. Work, work, work. And then other people are like, my friend the other day was like, I have got to find something other than stained yoga pants because I’m just all comfort and know anything else, right? So you can get into a lot of deep.

coaching conversations around what’s in the closet and why, and what you wanna have in the closet and why. And all these things with tags still on it, and my God, I don’t wanna spend money until I look a certain way. And so that’s a big part of it. As well as mindset. I coach my clients through the book and through sessions, of course, around how do you want to talk to yourself? High quality thoughts and conversations versus low quality thoughts and conversations.

Lily @ Date Brazen (11:25.688)

Food is in the book, but we talk about it. There’s no moral value associated with food. Like you’re not bad if you eat Pop Tarts and you’re not good if you eat broccoli. It’s, hey, let’s discover what foods power you up and let’s discuss what foods are strictly for pleasure and we get to have all of it. And if you can do it wrong, you’re on a fucking diet and stop that. Okay? I love that.

Susan pausing there. If you can do it wrong, then you’re on a diet. And we know diet culture is a weapon against people and women specifically living their lives. It’s never ending game with different sets of rules. You know, fat. I grew up in the low fat era. Yeah. And now we’re in, and I love, listen,

Most of my I love me some pot roast. I mean, most of my power foods are fatty. But notice that we went from fat free to now we’re putting butter in our coffee. and and never mind. You know, now we’re going to time when it’s appropriate for us to eat. And forget that. Now we’re going to do meat only. No, no, no, that’s not OK. It’s plant based on.

And so just notice that anything that has a lot of sets of rules, you have to decide for your own system what feels good in your body and stop adhering to stringent rules around how you eat. Yes, I think of this in my work as well. in one of my programs, we I give this gorgeous big workbook. And in the opening call, I say, I love my workbook and fuck the workbook.

I like fuck the workbook that I created. I love it. It’s got great questions. It’s going to change your life and fuck it. It does it like starting there. I think scrambles people’s brains a lot because they think wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I joined this program because or I did this thing because I want to follow the rules to get to the thing. And I wonder for you, how do you coach people through releasing the rules while still feeling emotionally safe? Because I do think the rules.

Lily @ Date Brazen (13:49.24)

have created this like semblance of I’m safe if I’m doing the thing that was prescribed because someone knows more than me. How do you help unwind that for folks? Well, mindset work for sure. So we spend a lot of time looking at all the different places that we’ve given our power over to, like you’re saying, like your workbook, the bare process, right? Same. It’s like, these are things that, that

I wanna invite you to participate in and you get to decide because one of the tools that I teach in addition to mindset is the wisdom of the body and the body knows. And so when I can help women tune into this like yes barometer, this inner GPS, this body compass and have the body tell you, yeah, I feel great when I eat a lot of fat.

I know that’s contrary to these other things, but let’s just see how my body responds. Or guess what? I feel best when I eat plant-based. Fabulous, right? Let’s just pay attention to the signals of the body. Cause guess what? It’s with you 24 seven. It’s free to you. And it is always giving you Intel. The trick is learning how to get the body and the mind to work together.

instead of elevating intelligence over the wisdom of the body, which is what we tend to do. We want to go with a rigid plan that’s from the mind instead of the wisdom of the body. What’s one way that people can get in touch with the wisdom of their body, like today? Right, today. So for many of your listeners, and this was me previously, I have to just say, in fact, the first person to teach me that my body

had wisdom that I should listen to or could listen to was Dr. Martha Beck who trained me. And I remember when she taught us this in coach training, I thought I’m never using that. That’s not for me. I’m practical. My clients are practical, smart people who are not going to, this is far too woo woo. And it is.

Lily @ Date Brazen (16:02.806)

honest to God, the foundation of everything that I do now. So if you’re listening and you have resistance to this, the reason you have resistance to it is that most women have suffered trauma. And when you are someone who has suffered from trauma, you disassociate from the body. So you are all up here, like chin up, right? We’re going to focus up here because if we climb into the body and get down here and experience our emotions, it feels scary.

So the first thing I want to say is when you start tuning into what your body is feeling by taking deep breaths and asking yourself, what am I feeling? If you notice emotion, strong emotion, that’s normal. Eventually you can get to a place where you can identify the emotion and then the physical sensations associated with that emotion that can help fine tune your barometer.

But the first step is really, the easiest first step is taking deep breaths. And from the top of your head to the tips of your toes, just do a scan and say, what do I notice? What am I feeling? And often it’s like, my God, I feel some anxiety. What is that about? Or, wow, the back of my neck is so tight. Why am I so tense?

And you can start to uncover like, whoa, I have been holding my breath or holding it together. And there are all these emotions just ready to point me in the right direction. Yeah. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve done a body scan and found that like my butt is clenched.

So I started with when I do my own body thing, I’m like, unclench your butthole, Lily. Like, don’t like, I tell that to my clients. I’m like, people say forehead, you know, jaw. I’m like, unclench your butthole right now. Listen, that is so real. And it’s like, I am, I’m I’m a jaw clencher, but I’m a, I’m a butt clencher too. I, people are afraid to talk about it. I love that you’re just going to say it.

Lily @ Date Brazen (18:21.134)

I see you were my people, right? So it’s like, what, and then you have to say like, what is anger trying to tell me? What is the sadness about? Really? Like get to know what it is so that you can be in situations where you’re like, yeah, this is not for me, you know, or like, I gotta make some changes here, boundaries, whatever it might be. I think that when people are unlearning and stepping out of diet culture,

your best tool is the wisdom of your body. it really, your body is going to tell you. Like this fasting thing is bullshit for me. People might be like, you know, I feel great when I do that. Right. do. I’m just thinking to take a step back into the conversation about like, what is my body trying to tell me? I’m on a journey of bound boundary setting in a certain part of my life personally. And it’s

feels so vulnerable to notice and to be on the journey of setting a boundary when you know that it’s gonna rock a status quo or you know that it’s gonna lead to a hard conversation or you’re just afraid, speaking from the eye in my case, I am afraid of some loneliness.

when, when I listen and then act, what would you say to people who notice, right? They’re taking a deep breath, doing the body scan, they’re on clenching, they’re noticing, they pay attention, they get curious, like you’re saying. And then they realize like, holy shit, I’m being told to, I I’m feeling the need to do this thing that is scary to do. What do you say then? So then that’s when.

when the body tells you a boundary needs to happen here and notice, right, the mind goes crazy. The mind is like, uh-oh, you’re gonna upset people, you’re gonna get kicked out of the group, right? You mentioned it, and then you start, I’m afraid I’m gonna feel lonely, right? Then it’s mindset work where it’s really saying like, okay, but don’t I feel lonely already? Because I’m abandoning myself, right? There’s some coaching to be done and some mindset work to do around.

Lily @ Date Brazen (20:48.225)

Do I want to be true to myself? Do I want to be honest with myself? And sometimes the price is absolutely removing yourself from relationships that can’t honor those boundaries, right? So it’s not like,

you learn how to use the wisdom of the body and nothing bad ever happens, or you’re never uncomfortable again. It’s just that you’re aware of it and you can make a choice based on that wisdom. So at first, people are scared to do it because they’re like, what the hell did we do? And it’s like, for a little while, just notice. And then you can start to work on, what do I want to do about it? And what’s the highest quality?

mindset I can have around, okay, if I hold this boundary, what can I control? I can only control what I say and do. And if the other person goes ballistic or decides they don’t want to be my friend anymore, or they’re not coming to Thanksgiving or whatever it might be, right? That’s not within your control. So there’s so much there, but it’s like, wow, am I going to live with my ass clenched

and just put up with this?

Yeah. I think that that’s- do whatever, like be a workaholic or an overeater or a gambler or like whatever coping mechanism you’re Undereater. Right, undereater, deprivation. Right. And I think this gets into something that I love to talk about, which is pleasure and how pleasure can be healing and how pleasure is.

Lily @ Date Brazen (22:41.154)

really also tough for most people that I speak to who’ve been socialized in the racist capitalist patriarchy. And so talk to me about how people, what the benefits of pleasure from your experience, it has very specific benefits. And then also like what that looks like in practice. Sure. So I call it vitamin P.

Cute. Right. And pleasure is first of all, the interesting thing is you’re correct. We’re raised in this culture where it’s like work hard, play later if you work hard, you know. And when you play blackout drunk and, and go and don’t remember that I, that’s like playing hard is like this, like, anyway, go ahead. Yeah. and so.

We come into this world wired from head to toe to receive pleasure. Your body all over it is expecting to experience pleasure in a variety of ways, because there are many forms of pleasure all day long. And we operate in a way where we deny ourselves pleasure and then wonder why we’re having all the issues we’re having. so I’m always like, pleasure saves lives because

when your body gets what it needs, when your body experiences pleasure in a variety of ways. And we can talk about those ways. So there’s spiritual pleasure, there’s physical pleasure. Everybody thinks I’m going right to sex. Physical pleasure and sex is just one form of pleasure, right? There’s comfort, there’s intellectual pleasure, there’s many forms of pleasure.

when your body does receive that on a consistent basis, it does all the things you think you’re going to get from a diet or from, you know, bullshit rules, right? You’re, you are flooded with feel good hormones. So you get an endorphin rush. your hormones have a better time.

Lily @ Date Brazen (24:55.982)

As a menopausal woman, I won’t say your hormones are always balanced, but like they got a better shot if you’re having a great pleasure, right? Your metabolism is on point. Like all systems are communicating to each other because that’s what happens when your body gets what it needs. Yeah, integrated. Right, integrated. And so one of my biggest missions is to sell women.

on the fact that you’re wired for it, you don’t have to earn it, you get to experience it, and everything you think you want from this bullshit deprivation lifestyle, you actually get from pleasure. Yeah. And for women and folks socialized as women, this is really, really revolutionary, I think, you know, because…

For a myriad of reasons, I mean, can look back to the abstinence-only Alabama state-sanctioned sex education policy that, you know, I was never taught about pleasure and sex. And then I was never also, and then, you know, other kinds of pleasure, like indulging in a long, great book or like, you know, those were also sort of hindrances to productivity.

in ways that I was taught. And so I think that this is about stripping away and getting bare. Stripping away those like, like really being aware of your own gates to pleasure in your fricking life. Totally. And I love that you said your own gates to pleasure. I love it. Well, right. Because, you know, girls and women are raised to

deny ourselves of pleasure in all ways. And if a woman embraces her pleasure, she becomes dangerous to the status quo. Because once you’re like full of pleasure and you figure out what your gates are to pleasure and you figure out how to consistently give yourself pleasure, then it’s so much easier to hear the wisdom of the body, to have boundaries. Like you have the capacity to say,

Lily @ Date Brazen (27:16.718)

Yeah, this is probably going to result in a really difficult conversation and perhaps some upsetting changes to our holiday schedule. And I’m resourced in a way that I’ve never been before and can handle it. Yeah. I’m curious to pivot to 2025 because this we’re recording this before 2025 and this is January 7th, 2025 when this is coming out. What is your

I know you probably have a hot take on New Year energy and like, you know, obviously there’s a lot of new year, new you going on. I want to hear your thoughts on your hot takes on that. And I want to hear what is one thing that you recommend for people to have an epic season this year. Epic season. So I mean, I love a new year. I love, I love. So

Human beings love a calendared reason. Like, it’s on, this is my year, right? And the truth is, most of the new year, new you stuff doesn’t equip people to create sustainable change. And so that’s where it gets a bad.

And we know as coaches that any moment in time, at any time of the year, you can decide like, it’s a new year for me. It’s a new day, right? So however, I mean, I love a fresh calendar. I love just using the calendar as a way to say like, here are my visions and goals for the year and all that stuff. break the year into different quarters.

and I have, something that I’m doing new this year is I’m creating my dream out of the office auto responder for each quarter based on my goals. What do you mean Susan Hyatt? So years ago, when I first became a coach, was my second year as a coach. was going through master coach training.

Lily @ Date Brazen (29:39.746)

And there was a woman named Markita Thompson, hi Markita, who, she lived in the Pacific Northwest and August where she lives is like the best, most beautiful month for her in the summer. And so she, we were working on a project together and she had an out of the office responder about taking the entire month of August off.

And I was like, what is this magic of what you speak? I was like, what do you mean? Pussy tingle. I mean, there you go. Instead of butt clinch, pussy tingle, that’s your body comp that’s talking to you. So I was like, Marquita, what do you ever mean? And she was like, you just schedule it and you just take it off and make it happen. And I…

was like, I’ve never. But what about the people who are mad at me for not being in the office? I just, mind blown. And so that prompted me at that time in my life to challenge myself to take like a holiday sabbatical. Cause at that time my kids were little, the holidays were kind of stressful for me. And so I started taking, this was August and I was like, okay, I’m gonna take three weeks off in December.

And I did it and wrote an out of the office responder that was like, I’m taking a holiday sabbatical, jingle jangle, know, happy, happy, merry, merry. I hope you have a great holiday season. And that has been all these years. I do it every single year. This year, through the work with one of my clients who was having a hard time taking time off, I assigned to her, if you could, let’s just pretend.

if you could take the time off you wanted, where would you go? What would you do? And what would your out of the office autoresponder say? Which has now led for the two of us to decide we’re gonna create quarterly, out of the office autoresponders that reflect not just the time off we wanna have necessarily, but like, what are the goals we’re going for? So it might be like, hey, I’m out of the office because I’m hiking the Camino or I’m out of the office because

Lily @ Date Brazen (32:03.478)

you know, I’m celebrating some big milestone, whatever it might be, but I break the year into quarters anyway. I do a quarterly plan anyway. Why not tie this aspirational out of the office message to it and see if you have the bravery to create it and publish it? So good. And is it- fun. So fun. Is it just for time off?

or do you have an item? you have a responder on all the time? Tell me about that. I don’t have a responder on all the time. And a lot of the time I’m gone and I don’t even like, know, somebody else is checking my messages anyway, But I am doing the exercise. It’s not like nobody emails me, but you know, my clients know, they see what I’m up to on social media typically.

And I don’t feel the same need to say where I am and why I’m not answering email, but I think you can tie it to whatever. It could be like an announcement. Like, I can’t wait to get back to you. This is what’s happening for me, right? So cool. But I think that if people want to create whatever season they want to create, yes, you can have career and business goals, but I’m begging you to have pleasure and life goals in there as well.

and really get down to like, what is it that I want to be experiencing? Is it rest and downtime? Is it, you know, are you in a season where you’re like, I would love to be able to go travel and see my kid play lacrosse, like whatever it might be. What are some of yours? Well, Scott Hyatt is afraid. Period, end of sentence. Scott Hyatt is afraid.

He’s like, my God, cause he knows when I get an idea that it’s going to happen no matter what at some point. And so my latest idea is I love to boat. It’s my, one of my favorite things to do. And there is something called the great loop, which is a series of waterways through locks, dams, rivers, and oceans that connects 14 states and three countries.

Lily @ Date Brazen (34:29.646)

and you can start the great loop where we are. Our boat is at Green Turtle Bay in Kentucky, and you can go all the way down to the Gulf, around, the Atlantic, across Canada. What kind of boat are we talking about? It’s a big boat. It’s like a, a sailboat. No, although people do do it on a sailboat, but it is a gas-powered boat. Amazing. Okay, great, great, great, great. So you’re not navigating the winds.

No. No. Okay. So you want to do, what do you want to do? I want, so I want to do the great loop and I want to get, so I’m working on a book proposal right now that’s about taking bold action in midlife. And so I’m like, this is it. This is our bold action. I’m going to be like AARP’s poster child. I’m going to get, a boat sponsor. I’m going to get a swimsuit sponsor. I’m going to get like the whole thing. And Scott’s like, he’s like, what are you going to do?

with six pets and I’m like, well, sailor outfits, of course. was, he was like, Little teeny tiny life vests. I was like, it’s going to be hilarious and awesome and we’re doing it. Well, now I started following. I, the universe put in my algorithm, this young man who sold everything and he is sailing the world on a sailboat.

And I was like, why am I limiting myself to the great loop? Why not both the world? Around the world in 80 days. was like, Scott, new plan. I was like, okay, we could do segments of the great loop. I’m not abandoning that, but what, this kid’s in a Maltby. Like, what if we just like go all around and he’s just like, I need Maylocks, you. my God.

why the fuck not? Amazing. Also, if your dreams not coming together in the way that you want, maybe the dream’s too small. And I’m like, maybe the great loop’s not big enough. Wow. When are you going to decide? So I’m working on this book proposal right now. And I think my intention is to have a book deal, you know, before the holidays. And thank you more, please. Let’s pause. Let’s

Lily @ Date Brazen (36:58.038)

Let’s speak in sentences like this. Yes. Go ahead, Susan. And so then once I have the book deal, I’m going to pitch sponsors. so my goal is because Scott has a dollar figure in his mind where he’s like, like he doesn’t he work. This man has a career. Yeah. Yeah. He’s kind of like, OK, like I get it. You can run your company from a boat, but I cannot.

Yeah. He has a figure in his mind that would make it worth his while to to potentially retire early or take a sabbatical because if he takes his business is commercial real estate. If he takes a sabbatical, it’s diff. It’s a little different. Yeah. And so I’m like, OK. He thought that would cause me to go, yeah. Darn it. And I’m like, OK, game fucking on.

All right, let me get these sponsors. Yes, get the sponsors. He’s just like, my God, how loud. When we were just in Chicago, he was like, OK, this is the boat I found that would be great for the loop. And I’m like, see, now it’s your idea. I love it. I love it. So book, bold midlife action. That’s what’s up. Amazing. Thank you more pleased to that. I would say.

Why don’t you everybody listening? I really want you to come up with a pleasure goal for your year a pleasure like desire pleasure intention for the year and use the audacity of Just like I use audacity in the sense that I’m like very I honor audacity Especially in women and people socialize as women. I think it’s really powerful and I want us all to be more audacious this year

And I want us all to be more pleasure centered, period. Period. Because why not? This is our one wild and precious life. That’s right. mean, listen. What are we going to do? What we’re not going to do is be deprived and burnout and sad sacks. That’s not what we’re up to. No. Give us final, final question. OK. Give us a pep talk. OK.

Lily @ Date Brazen (39:24.846)

for the new year on being bold and unapologetic and pleasure centered in dating and in everywhere. What’s a pep talk, especially for people, let’s cast them in our minds. People who are like, yeah, but I can’t do this because I don’t have a lot of money or I can’t do this because I’m a caregiver for a parent full time.

Or I can’t do this because I’m a full-time public school teacher and I come home at 5 p.m. after spending all my money on school supplies and I can’t, right? Like casting the person in your mind to truly does not believe that this conversation or this type of pleasure is for them. I wanna focus on them. So here’s the thing. Here’s what I’ve gotta say about that. Your obstacle is not greater than your potential.

And I really want you to let that sink in because we believe our own bullshit. So your excuses and your obstacles are not bigger than your potential. And I was a burnout real estate agent, right? With a couple of little kids and didn’t believe that there was anything for me. I believed that I was just not one of those people who could find their passion. I remember thinking like, wow,

I’m so inspired, I grew up watching Oprah and somehow that missed me. I was just like going through the motion, checking all the boxes, like just what you’re saying, like caretaking and I’m getting home and flapping on the couch and binge eating and I don’t have the money. One year we didn’t have $37 for a Christmas tree from the Boy Scout tree lot. So I get.

that maybe your bank account right now has $3 in it or is overdrawn. And I get that you have people, you feel responsible that you’re taking care of. And also what I know is that if you start to practice these things, if you listen to Lilly’s podcast, if you start saying thank you more, please, if you start making just little moves, little bold moves, you will start to see

Lily @ Date Brazen (41:49.23)

pockets of time and capacity open up to where you can hear from the wisdom of your body, from your higher guidance, what’s the next best move. So I get that you’re like, great, go both the great loops, Susan Hyatt, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But that comes as a result of body wisdom, difficult conversations, boundaries, crying on the floor, know, all the things.

And I continue to have setbacks and challenges. I continue to have things that pop up really serious issues in my family where I’m like, I have a choice where I can get swallowed under or I can rise up. And so if you need to hear anything today about creating your 2025, it’s that you are bigger than any problem presented to you.

Thank you, more place to that. Y’all re-listen to this episode. Go follow Susan Hyatt everywhere. Susan, if people wanna work with you, how can they do that? thank you for asking. So you can check out my programs at susanhyatt.co. Follow me on social media at Susan Hyatt. I have a membership community called Big Yes Energy that is enrolling. I also work with clients one-on-one. I train coaches.

and I have mastermind. So there’s lots of group and individual things you could do with me or go on a retreat. And your retreats, mean, the locations, do you know what is coming up for 2025? So the only thing on the books right now is Walking the Camino in September of 2025. And the reason why is because I’m waiting on this book deal and how quickly I’m going to be boating. the boat.

And get on the boat. Get on the boat. G O T B. Get on the boat. All right, Susan Hyatt. Y’all we’re going to link everything that Susan just mentioned in the show notes and in the description of the episode. Susan, thank you for coming on and let’s go do one thing that brings us pleasure. All of us listening right after this. All right. Talk to you all next week.