Hey you! I’m Lily.
An unconventional dating coach dedicated to helping you build a clear path to the best relationship of your life.
I was raised in the south — Birmingham, Alabama to be exact — and now call New York City home. From the time I could speak, I was sensitive, loud, opinionated, enthusiastic. And subsequently was labeled "too much" by many.
In a world where women are told to be small, take up less space, I reaaaly didn't fit in.
I was also raised around people who measured women's value on whether or not they were married. (then and now, I don't believe that romantic relationship is the gold-standard of existence).
The wellbeing of women has always been my purpose,
From starting a nonprofit to end sex trafficking in Alabama, to working for an international women's right's organization. I never thought I'd work in the dating world, until during one fateful career change…
I became a matchmaker at a national firm.
I realized that the dating world was a way I could help women be well and rise.
Because from my own story and from the stories of hundreds of clients, it was clear that dating was a microcosm of every fear, hope, insecurity that we have in this life.
Dating really matters to our overall well being.
After setting up 399 dates,
I became one of the most successful matchmakers out of 160 around the country.
But something wasn't right...
I was in a toxic relationship.
He was everything I said I wanted on my checklist, and still I felt numb. I was accepting so little love and didn't know why or how I could find something better for myself.
I remember crying on the floor of his apartment, and 15 minutes later taking a matchmaking call telling a client "You deserve so much better!”
There was a huge disconnect.
I needed help.
—> I looked at matchmaking, but after years at this matchmaking firm, I saw a disappointing truth: That it only worked for a small group of my clients.
—> I looked to my friends, and all they knew to say was "Play the numbers game! Let me swipe for you!" (love my friends, but their dating advice was like the blind leading the blind).
—> And I asked my therapist, and she didn't know what to tell me (bless her never-been-on-a-dating-app-heart).
I knew something had to change. But where could I get help to find the relationship I ACTUALLY wanted? How could I gain the confidence to show up for myself and my dating life like the bold woman I was yearning to be?
I realized that to find the sort of love I wanted, the kind of love my clients wanted, we needed to embrace our "too much."
I started to create my own solution. I explored beneath the surface of my checklist, to uncover what it is I actually wanted.
I saw clearly that I need to heal from my self-limiting beliefs, define my deeper preferences and craft a dating strategy based on what I uniquely needed. And that I'd need to be bold as hell in the pursuit of this extraordinary love.
I call this work date coaching:
it’s a framework to make big change happen.
The results spoke for themselves: When I date coached my matchmaking clients on the sly, they started to find better dates for themselves than I or anyone could find for them. On a dating app, in the Sweet Green line, on the subway. (yes, really)
And for me, this work meant that I was able to break up with that toxic relationship, love being single for a while, and it was the reason that I was able to recognize and accept the love of my life partner, Chris (who was not on my old "checklist").
I broke up with matchmaking to build Date Brazen, and a just a few years later, I’ve helped hundreds of women around the world build a clear path to the best relationship of their lives with unconventional, feminist-leaning coaching.
So, what does success look like?
If you end up in a relationship because of our work together (as many of my clients do), that’s an amazing cherry on top.
My desired success for you looks like how confident you are in exactly who you are, how you trust yourself to qualify the right dates and disqualify the wrong ones and how to you set boundaries and stick to them.
If you feel led to join me, I'll give you the tools to transform your whole life, starting with finding the love you desire.
